How do I love thee Thrill Capitol of the World
Let me count all the ways you make my heart awhirl
Stepping through your entrance, I feel such a blend
Of grateful and gleeful to be here once again
I make a beeline for the back of the park
Where I’ve learned it’s often the best place to start
But still I will routinely check wait times in the app
To strategize my route and which direction to lap
Maybe if I’m lucky, I’ll start with real height
Soaring like Wonder Woman on her courageous flight
This brand new smooth coaster climbs up to 131 feet
The tallest and longest single rail none else on earth can beat
Then while I’m right there in the DC Universe
I’ll hop on the Batman Ride for the five times it inverts
It may be a shorter ride swooping fast and low
But still quite smooth and thrilling, especially in the front row
On the way out we also hit the biggest drop to beat
Lex Luther’s Drop of Doom free falls from 400 feet
From there I could next go many a different way
Depending on which line looks the shortest on that day
Perhaps I’ll head down to the Screampunk District
To ride two more of my very top park favorites
First, Twisted Colossus is truly double the fun
The world’s longest hybrid coaster with two 128 foot drops in one
Then next door is another ride worthy an exclaim
With seven inversions, 150 feet high, Scream! lives up to its name
Now onward and forward we could really get our fix
With Goliath’s 255 foot drop and 4.5 Gs on the helix
Then if we continue this direction coming back
The powerful Full Throttle launches you thrice on its track
Or instead from DC Universe we could also have gone
Deeper back into the park to more thrills and beyond
We’d next meander through the Boardwalk of games
And all the oversized prizes each one of them claims
There’s also Johnny Rockets here and rows of more places to eat
It’s one of the best break spots when you need to get off your feet
We also pass crazy Crazanity the world’s tallest pendulum
Swinging to 172 feet high until your whole body goes numb
Next we enter Metropolis where the Riddler gets Revenge
Though he hasn’t for awhile now since the ride has been benched
But here in Metropolis we can still Battle in 3D
Shooting interactive villains with the Justice League
Across the road is the park’s oldest coaster fun
The Gold Rusher mine train has been here since 1971
The next year, another ride was added to the dream
The first turntable-loading log flume water ride Jet Stream
Onward we finally reach the park’s Underground
Where many more thrilling rides and tasty treats abound
West Coast Racers is probably its most popular
The world’s first side-by-side dual track racing launch coaster
I do think it’s worth the hype if you’re willing to wait
But play it smart, watch the app, or try very early or late
Also in this Underground is some classic wooden thrills
The Apocalypse never inverts, but has some serious air time hills
Now let’s take the winding path around and partway back
And wander into the next land for more fun rides and snack
To your right the Roaring Rapids white water adventure ride
Takes you down man-made rapids and leaves you a bit on the wet side
Across the road is Tatsu, possibly my favorite pick
The world’s tallest, fastest flying coaster soaring so smooth and quick
And next door is another great spot for something to eat
BBQ burgers, dogs, or turkey legs, Katy’s Kettle has all the best meat
Next to Tatsu is a secret path that will take you up Samurai Summit
Where you can find two more rides, both musts to say you’ve done it
Superman: Escape from Krypton launches you 100 miles per hour
All while facing backwards up a 41-story tower
But even better for Samurai land is the Ninja suspended ride
A smoother swinging coaster that never flips upside
There’s not much else up here yet, though that may change in time
But until then, let’s head back down and see what else we find
Onward on that winding path that leads back to the front
We pass the most intense of rides not for the faint of heart
Viper starts you off strong with a 171 foot drop
Followed by seven inversions that almost make your heart stop
But the true monster here is the 4D beast that is X2
With seats that flip 360 degrees, music, and flame effects too
I’ve never been shaken harder or had my world so flipped around
Than riding this X2 coaster and losing all sense of the ground
I do still recommend this unique experience
Just sit in the innermost seat to make it slightly less intense
Now back to the very front of the park we go
Past the slow sweet carousel and shops to spend your dough
Here lives our last ride left: The New Revolution Classic
America’s first ever looping coaster which opened in 1976
There you have all the big rides in this magical place
And all the ways it puts a huge smile across my face
It also holds the world record of most coasters in one park
Which is a pretty good reason you gotta stay till dark
So let’s go get our fill of thrill, as they say, more flags more fun
It certainly does boast the most, with much more still to come
